From the pages of my life; stories of an Indigo Scout & and parent of Indigo's
Hello and welcome to the pages of my life. Here is a small part of my journey -some of the highs and the lows
I share this information with you to offer support, and to demonstrate that even rocky roads are worth
I have walked many paths. Some have led me away from the Light to places of despair, feeling terribly sad and alone, and many more have led me into it, into the glorious, bliss-filled, wonder of it.All these paths have been vital ground work to enrich the work I have come here to do, for they are helping me to gain a deeper understanding, a lack of judgment, and all encompassing Love and Compassion for myself, others, and my own Divine Mission and Purpose.
The road became smoother the further I travelled
- A Little Bit About Me ...
I arrived on the planet in 1957, into a family of loving souls. We have supported each other to the best of our abilities ... many times though, I have felt so alone, so different as to wonder if I had a place here (in life) at all
I was born intom a tie of women in the kitchen, men out a work or in the back yard in the shed fixing something or reading the paper, and good little children were seen and not heard.
I didn't know what to do with all this, I had things I needed to say! I just didn't feel like I fit anywhere, plus, I was seeing things that apparently weren't there, and people who I knew had died were coming to visit me. There just wasn't anyone to tell. It was a sometimes sad and lonely time for an out-going little girl.
- People Pleasing became the norm
How to get closer to my dad, who I just loved, but was also afraid of? I could sense so much going on inside of him, but he was born into a time of 'keep it all bottled up, 'don't rock the boat', and 'men are strong and DO NOT share their feelings - ever', which of course, made him appear remote and distant, and quite scary to me.
The stage was set. I tried to please, tried to be 'good', tried to conform so I would be 'normal
"What's wrong with me, am I bad or something?"
Now, this story is no different form many other stories, except it is mine. I tried and tried to feel like my day loved me, but instead, I always ended up feeling like a failure. Why didn't he do and say the things I wanted him to?? Why couldn't he just try harder?? Why did we fight and argue?? What was I doing wrong????
- I would feel SO much anger! and I seemed to feel EVERYTHING SO DEEPLY
"depression and anger became my ways .."
- So many years, so much water under the bridge.
Things continued on this course for a long time. I acted out, blamed a lot of people, events and things. I married, had children. I became extremely busy. I had lots of happy times, experiences, moments. I loved being a mother to my kids. But I as a person, was not happy.
- Slowly, bit by bit, I began to look at myself.
I began to read make discoveries, explore, make decisions, and as I began to seek acceptance and peace WITH IN MYSELF, so many things about my life, my views, and my relationships began to change.
It was not until I was about 40 that I realised that my father loves me. Not in the way of my fairy tale imaginings, but in the way he does, and all that time I had spent trying to 'get' him to love me, I had not seen that he already did. His way was just different to the way I thought it had to be, and once I accepted him as he was, it was like a veil had been lifted from my eyes, and he actually LOOKED different to me! One day, it just happened, just like a snap of the fingers.
Acceptance of myself was the key that unlocked my relationship with my dad, and as this had always been one of my main life-issues, it really was an amazing experience!
"Dear Dad ..."
Bit by beautiful bit, discovery, by amazing discovery, I slowly came into the awareness of giving more of what it is I want to have present in my life - The Law of Attraction One night, I then wrote my dad a letter, telling him of all that he had taught me, both the big things and little, like for example, he was the one who taught me that a simple request for help from a child makes that child feel important and capable, not to say anything about someone, if it's not positive or affirming (still learning that one!) and that using conditioner after shampooing made my hair shine and feel so soft! Writing this letter was soothing, healing, and it served as a reminder of all he had helped me with and parented me through. It bought so many memories to life, and it bought me so close to my dad in my heart and mind. I cried, I laughed, I built new bridges between he and I within my heart and mind.. Recently, I was able to look my dad in the eyes, and tell him how happy and honoured I feel that he was the one to help give me life. A truly magnificent moment for me, for us both. We held each other, we cried, we laughed ...
"Building bridges of Love"
I needed reminding, and this was a lovely gentle way of helping myself to see all that I had become blinded to, without guilt or blame I encourage you to write your own letter, whether you can or do mail it or not is not important. It's the writing it that is
- At Last. My Life Begins To Make Sense!
It took many years to learn, and to be set free by the knowledge that I am in fact an Indigo Scout
Indigo Scouts started coming to the planet in greater numbers around 1940 in response to the prayers being sent up for peace on earth bought about by World War 1 (WW1 1914 - 1918 ) and then again during World War11 (WW2 1939-1945)
"Never doubt the power of your prayers and positive thoughts!"
- Not everyone born during the 40's, 50's, and 60's is an Indigo Scout of course, but for those of us who are, or, if you are now wondering if you may be, here is a list of traits common to Indigo's
There is just so much to learn, understand, and be aware of about what it actually means to be an Indigo child or person , the highly sensitive body and emotions of an Indigo and what Indigo's have actually come here to do. There is simply no point expecting an Indigo to learn, express, dress, feel the way everyone else does, we're just not built that way. If you have an Indigo teen, they simply can not sit still and call a teacher Sir when that very teacher shows no respect for their students for example.
Here a some valuable video clips on Indigo's Jeffrey Star
- teen-age Indigo and self professed Peace Maker Neale Donald Walsch Dr Doreen Virtue
Indigo people are incredibly deep feelers! I can tell you it's not an easy road to feel everything as if it were actually happening to you. Indigo's are also extremely fiery natured, and can get very caught up in feelings of anger and will lash out for what may seem to be the smallest of reasons. Indigo's have a built in lie detector (Indigo Scouts may or may not have access to this as we learned how to swallow our feelings and became desensitized) There are many courses
, and books written about Indigo's, so read up if you feel you, or someone close to you, may be an Indigo
"Learning about myself teaches me to bloom"
- I have learned quite a lot on my way.
About love, life, laughter, speaking from the heart, harsh words and their effects on both myself and others, heartache, suicide, divorce, death, joy, and how to soothe a frightened child, even when that that child is within me.
I have learned that angels actually do exist, that we all have at least two guardian angels, and that part of my purpose here on Earth is to work with them, and help others should they also wish to learn about them.
My life opened in the most magnificent ways once I began to work with the angelic realm. I had absolutely no money, yet, I just KNEW I needed to attend Doreen Virtues Angel Intuitive certification
course back in 2003.
I could think of nothing else! It felt so right, (a sure sigh of guidance is this feeling of rightness, joy, and a sense of peace. Couple all that with the repetitive signs and you have the hallmark of angelic guidance. They simply do not stop until we have gotten the message) It took me a year, as I had first received the guidance to do this course in 2002, but now, the pull was unmistakable!
Angel Intuitive Certification gave me wings!"
I had NO money. I had debt, but I also had a new sense of faith, of rightness, so I rang Hay House and registered! I felt so FREE!! Suddenly, I felt at peace, and I had a strong 'knowing' that the money would come. It turned up just in time to pay my tuition - of course! And so began the journey into an amazing, richly layered part of my life, one I would never even have dreamed possible once upon a time...
- Looking back to 1992 - Reiki, An Energetic Awakening & The Tools To Help Save My Dads Life
"Reiki: a powerful, yet very gentle Healing energy."
My father and step-mother introduced me to Reiki in 1992, generously gifting me with Reiki 1
What a discovery for me! My Attunement was a very powerful experience, and opened me in ways yet I had yet to discover
This beautiful healing energy would later save my fathers life. I had never seen someone actually crossing over before. My dad had had several heart attacks, twice he died, and twice he was resuscitated. After this third attack, we were called to the hospital, where the Doctor told us that my dad would not be moved to the larger, far better equipped hospital an hour and a half away as it was unlikely he would survive the journey. When that same Doctor told us they were moving him, and we should spend some time with him while they organised his move via ambulance, my whole body and mind became terribly numb, yet sharp with painful anticipation.
"My Dad was leaving this world before my eyes" ...
When I entered my dads room, it was plain to see that he was already going.
It was awful... I am crying as I write this ... Only two people at a time could go in, so between my sister, my step mother and I (all of us attuned in Reiki) sat by my dad, our hands on him, feeling so grateful for this wonderful Reiki energy to flowing through us.
Dad was pulling so much energy that my hands were burning hot, I had to rotate hands, I just found it too hot to keep both on him. We stayed like this until the ambulance came and took him away. The drive back was the longest of my life.
My husband kept asking me to call the hospital to see if he had arrived yet, but I just couldn't. I didn't want to hear that my dad had died over the phone. On and on we drove, seemingly covering no distance at all, and time felt so heavy that it dragged by at a snails pace. Finally, we reached our destination. With a heavy heart, I walked into the Intensive Cardiac Care Unit and asked after my dad. The Nurse asked us to follow her. She pulled the curtain and there he was .... sitting up in bed, chatting with the nurses, beaming at us!!
That day changed everything for me. Both the what I thought of as possible, and impossible. Little do we know of the far reaching consequences of the gifts we give
"Take my hand little one, together we will learn ..."
I have 3 children, teachers of their mother all.
My two girls are Indigo's, and can smell a lie at 1000 paces
[it should be noted here that the following picture are not of my own children, but representative and freely available from sxc.hu]
My youngest would bite herself in frustration, then
cry and hold out her little hand for me to kiss better.
To raise these Indigo's was an honour and an extreme irritant at once, with me not knowing what to do to make
them 'behave' and do as they were told! I mean, it was my job to make them listen to me, right?
Wrong! I began to discover, it was my job to guide, teach and listen to them, so they would grow tall and strong, able to fulfill their own life purpose.They constantly rocked the boat, so it was quite a challenge for me, living under watchful eyes of the outside world, and still learning to walk free of People Pleasing.
- Indigo's are here to rock the boat! The sooner you learn that, the sooner you will become a more effective parent to them. Oh, and they won't respond to guilt tactics.
The lament of parents everywhere I know ...
Raising Indigo's is an incredible journey into madness, or sanity; depending on how you decide to parent.
- Remember; You signed up for it before you incarnated.
- You DO have what it takes. Dig deep. Don't stop. Go out on a limb for them. Indigo's are a gift to the world and so are you.
On a personal note, I did discover, after many years, to honour and teach my Indigo's about their built-in fire and encouraged them to channel it instead of trying to put it out.I also learned this magical phrase: "When you have a minute, I'd like to run something by you." Instead of saying things like; " I want to talk to you about something - now!", or 'I'm the mother, you will
listen to me!" or "Why wont you do as you are told for once in you life?!!" Get the picture?
Life got a whole lot better for us all, let me tell you!
- Another vital thing you need to understand about Indigo's is their sensitivity to food colouring and additives. They are often mis-diagnosed with ADD and ADHD, or as Dr Doreen Virtue calls it, Attention Dialed Into A Higher Dimension Indigo's are here to break down old systems like "do it because I'm the boss and I say so", "don't ask questions, just do it!" and "it's the way things are done, so don't try to rock the boat." They are here to rock the boat
Unfair behaviour NEVER goes unnoticed by an Indigo!
Harsh tones, words and actions will never, ever get your messages across to an Indigo, and on top of that, you simply can not make an Indigo do what they think or feel is unfair!
- It stands to reason when you consider this very important fact
If we can make and Indigo tow the party line, or even clean their rooms (it's my room, I should be able to have it how I like it! Close the door, it doesn't have to affect you! etc), how will they ever dismantle unfair, corrupt or rigid systems in Government, schools etc?
- My son has been one of my greatest teachers in life.
"Joy can knock on your door when
you least expect it"
His ability to connect and relate to people of all ages, from any walk of life, his amazing gift of explaining the seemingly unexplainable, his love for animals and his willingness to go to bat for them, have all stopped me in my tracks in delight, awe and wonder A grown man now, he is still in touch with his sense of fun, of wonder and he still loves to explore ... Thanks TJ
I like, respect, adore, treasure them all and am blessed by their presence in my life, these keepers of my motherhood, these splendid human beings! *Please note that all images in this blog are either freely available from sxc.hu, or I have paid a fee to use.
Anayah Joi Holily
Founder and Excutive Producer of that Angel Heart Radio Network® 2010
Cert Reiki 1 1992 Cert Angel Intuitive 2003
Cert Angel Intuitive Advanced Training 2006