~~Mercury Retro-crap~~

[AkashicWreckage]

"How do you feel about Mercury Retrograde?" I asked Beach Buddy.

He's sitting across from me, facing a corner in the living room.
He's there with his lap top, which is hooked up to a keyboard---
Which is hooked up to two monitors, and his iPhone is also hooked into it all.
His earphones are hanging off to the left.
On the shelf below a table to his right are his aviation grade ear phones---
A couple of rocks/crystals are perched on top of a pile of Coastal Living magazines his mom sends him.
That's his command post.
It is from this perfect vantage point that he manages to control his little part of this reality.
He's gone from being on the couch---when he uses his lap top---to being at the dining room table---
To being set up in a corner over there.

He's suffered through various computer meltdowns over the past year.

And now---he's sitting and trying to figure out what to do with the virus on his computer, as I attempt to draw him into discussion.

It's my job to disrupt this as much as possible and to point out to him, the insanity of it all.
He is---after all---my Buddy.
If I don't act as a buffer, real world issues will overcome him.
Like the virus his computer has someone managed to catch.

Typical Mercury Retrocrap...

"It feels like a backwards intuition, " he says, distracted.

"What do you mean by that?" I ask.

"I don't," he replied.

I can't let him get away with these non answers.
To catch you up on this little quirk of his---this has been going on since I first met him---
He tries to evade answering things.
Or, it will be obvious that he's attempting to think of a way to answer, without really answering.
Other times, he gives a quickie mumble, totally unintelligible---
And---I have to ask him to repeat it, which has given him time to think of a way not to answer.

I continue to press him, "We've been through some very intense Mercury Retrogrades this year. " I remind him.
"What was the hardest one for you?" I shoot at him.

He ignores me and continues to pick his teeth with the corner of a baggie---
Let's hope he doesn't use that baggie to pack my next sandwich for work.

"Do you feel it's just Mercury retrograde that's been hitting us upside the head, or what?" I asked.

"I feel like there's probably something to it." he finally replies.

I would have been surprised if he didn't acknowledge the destruction Mercury Retrograde has delivered to our reality.
Yes, I used the word destruction---
And yes---at some point---- I do see the weird beauty in it too.

But Jesus Christ Almighty!
It's freakin' hard to get through!
I don't care if there are those who think it's nonsense---
That's okay with me.

Or--- if there are those who think it's best not to talk about the negative aspects of Mercury Retrograde---
Okay, I get that too.

But couple that with the full moon, Saturn in Libra---this is difficult stuff to work through.
No colon cleanse, chakra clearing or meditation is going to remedy this clogged up shi(f)t!

Back to this mini drama in the living room.

"Like----what do you think there is to this whole Mercury Retrograde thing?" picking up where I left off.

"It's probably a tangible energy." Beach Buddy said, turning towards me.

"This is all I'm going to give you, I'm not going to provide any more fodder for you." Beach Buddy snarled---
Yes, it was sort of a snarl.

"Two things I'm going to say about Mercury Retrograde---
One is that I've seen too many first hand examples, within the alleged energetic window of this backwards phenomenon, to not give it some credence." Beach Buddy stated softly.
"And the second is that I think there should be a metaphysical war on Mercury Retrograde launched."

"Mercury Retrograde and its casualties, is that enough for you to blog about now?" he said as he stood up and began to walk into the kitchen.

Immediately---I realize what he's getting at.
I have taken many of our conversations and transcribed them into blogs, but that's because they are blog worthy!
We've had some whopping discussions that have either left us crying in despair, or literally holding our sides because we've laughed so hard.
It's just the nature of this karmic thing we've got going on here---in this reality.

I began to think back in time, and Beach Buddy interrupted that with "Do I have to remind you about July 4th in 2008 and the lightning strike?"

"Was that a Mercury Retrograde period then?" I asked because I didn't recall it being one, but then each one has blended and merged into the one before.

"Look it up!" he snapped with a twinkle in his eye.

That's because when I use certain big words, Beach Buddy will ask me for a definition.
And----rather than waste my time trying to define it within the context of whatever it is we're discussing, I usually advise HIM to look it up.
He's tramping up and down my lines now---

So, I look it up.
Nope, it wasn't Mercury Retrograde that fateful holiday.
Even though all things electrical and technology related were impacted, the experiences couldn't be blamed on Mercury Retrograde.

But other Mercury Retrogrades have taken their toll, usually right at the onset.
I'm not sure it does much good to look back on what was, during other Retrograde periods.
Most Mercury Retrograde Survivors say we should look back, or we must look back in time, otherwise things won't go well for us.
Somehow, some way, Mercury will find out about it, and figure out how to deliver a swift kick in the ass.

I have resigned myself to Mercury Retrograde periods---
When that adorable Cosmic Trickster pays us all a visit---
Oh yeah, baby, bring it on.

I'd like to just crawl into a cave somewhere---on a beach would be nice, if it's not asking too much.
I usually allow myself to withdraw, to batten down the hatches, in a way.

I go through a whole thing as I walk toward the car, each day during a Mercury Retrograde.
I surround the car with protection.
I do this because I learned the hard way, back on the first day of Mercury Retrograde in May, when the air conditioning went belly up, on my car.
One minute everything was fine and within 5 minutes, it wasn't.
Lesson learned.
I surround and fill the car with as much angelic protection as possible.
I'm not taking aaaaaaaaaannnny chances anymore.

Next---the computers at work will go down, or the ordering system will go haywire.
Every single Mercury Retrograde, in the past 18 months, something happened to the computers at work.
This Mercury Retrograde, and I mean the very first day, a virus hit every single last networked computer.

My son's car broke down the next day and Beach Buddy's computer went on the fritz with the virus.

I observed all of this, with just a moderate degree of highly charged emotions.

On one side of my head, a part of my mind is screaming:
"Holy effing shit, when does this crap end? Why can't I stop believing in this nonsense? Someone, make it stop!"

And, on the other side of my head, a part of my mind, highly unsympathetic to the other side's rage against the Universe...
That side is thinking "Why get involved in this stuff? It will pass, don't get all excited or upset about it. Calm down."

A part of me, somewhere in the middle of all of this, tries to make sense of it, in real time.
"I'm gonna be honest, I need a playbook for this." Little Miss Middle Me says.

I go through this every single time there's a Mercury Retrograde, parts of my mind rise up in this dialogue.
One side wants to reflect back, try to cull some wisdom from the lessons, do everything that might be necessary to weather yet another Mercury Retrograde.

"This time, you should toe the line, stay in sync, be a good little Earth Student so that the awful crap will skip us this time!" she announces boldly.

"I'm so sick of this Mercury shi(f)t!" another voice inside my head says loudly. "I'm thinking very seriously about not believing in it any more." this brave voice continues.
"Maybe that way things might return to normal. We got along just fine without knowing when it was Mercury Retrograde, and we'd all like a little of that normalcy back in life."

Now, back to the other part of my mind---rebelling, "What about all of the valuable lessons you've learned? Insights into self---newly discovered nuggets of truth?"

"Oh my God, Jeeeeee-sus!" I hear in my head as this disagreement escalates.

Enough for now---
I'm leaving those three to duke this out while I try to get this thing finished here.

I have decided that the best way to get through this Mercury Misery, is to distract myself as much as I can.
And, if my thoughts go to the past, I'm going to allow it.
Over the past day, I've let my thoughts go back in time and---
Maybe that's an important part of surviving this Madness?

Going back---
Re-doing---

It is what it is.

I realize that this is always a period for re-searching---
For re-flection---
An opportunity to re-view---
A time to re-visit the past--- and issues that may be holding me back---
Patterns that may not be helpful anymore---
A chance to finally re-lease what is no longer in my highest good.
I re-conciled myself to realizing that it does lead to growth.
Fine, already!
I get it!

I can feel something within me now---wanting to take my thoughts back---
Going back not all that far in time---
I know I'm supposed to allow this, so I do.
Back to the beginning of May 2009, Mercury Retrograde.

I'm sitting here typing this, wondering how I'm going to end this now, without going back to THAT time in May.
I'm too tired to fight it.

Within mere hours of Mercury turning retrograde in May of 2009, the shi(f)t began to hit the fan.
My Beach Buddy lost his job, my car's air conditioner went schizophrenic and a bunch of other things began to go kaput.
That time period almost seems benign now---shifts and changes have been the only two menu options and discombobulation seems to be the default mode.

Many new insights during that Mercury Retrograde period---learning about what is valued, what has worth.
Beach Buddy and I had a discussion during the last week or so of April, right before the Retrograde----
About how much value there really is, in having a work history---what with the jobs being lost across the country.
I'm not sure how much real value a pimped up resume has, in today's world.

Our Value.

I know that these are times of opportunity, even in job loss----
People are beginning to move in different directions, gathering up their inner and outer creativity.
Many are moving into new insights about what IS of value---
What confirms---or what doesn't confirm---our worth and what we hold dear to us.
It is a time to move into creating that which reflects our inner gifts, which will show us more of our inner value.
And, showing the world that vision, the vision we hold of ourselves.

So, while I see the benefits of this time period, and realize that growth is happening---it's a chore to stay centered right now for me.
So many of these Mercury Retrograde periods offered so many hard hits---
For me---for Beach Buddy.
And---
For many people---

So----we are not alone.

After dinner one night during May, and I think it was towards the end of that Mercury Retrograde period, Beach Buddy and I went out on the porch, as usual.

The Mockingbirds were singing up a storm down here back then, and the nightly serenades were enthralling.
Magical songs, emotion-filled songs pierced the late night silence.

Mockingbirds are talented imitators, too---
And, they are experts at showing us that perhaps---
What we mimic, or even make fun of---helps us to see who we really are.

Mockingbirds teach us about confidence in ourselves

As I sat there, drawn into the power of what I was hearing---
As we sat on the porch, a thought popped into my head, that interrupted the song of the Mockingbirds---

What if?

What if all that Beach Buddy and I had experienced----
Had all been payback for mocking ("At times- And rightfully so," my ego just added) gooey gooey spiritual new age nonsense?

Well, so what?
That was a time, that Retrograde period, to get very clear about who we are, and the roles we are playing--- now--- in our world.

We WERE being challenged during that period of time, not just limited to those 3 weeks, to continue to awaken--- The process is not finished.
What is being reflected back to us, can be looked at as being given the gifts of----

Backwards Intuition?
Could there be such a thing as---Backwards Intuition, as Beach Buddy had postulated?

I had, that night in May, in that intense period of Mercury Retrograde, a stupid random thing interrupt the train of thought I was experiencing---

Like---
Were we being given---the gifts that were prying our eyes open?

Maybe to see that others need to see---
ALL of us--- as we continue on the paths we are on---
All of us, seeing that maybe we---ARE---awakening?
To see the flashes of enlightenment that strike very close to us.
And even to see the awakening of others, who we have left along the paths in our lives---

Mockingbirds also represent our soul's purpose.
Mockingbird represents the South---one of the 4 Cardinal Directions on the Medicine Wheel---
The South represents---
Growth, Trust, and Love.

I allow all of this to come into my thoughts---
This trip down memory lane isn't turning out the way I had thought it would---
But I know better than to argue with Mercury memories.

During the September Mercury Retrograde, we began to go absolutely berserk looking at condos to move to---
Beach Buddy and I scoured Craig's List in search of---
A new place to move to---
Closer to work---
Affordable---
A place with a view.
After 2 weeks of spinning our wheels, we finally realized that it wasn't meant to be---
Neither of us could shake the feeling that it was for the best.
Mercury Retrograde in Virgo/Libra.
It was about a healthy balance---would a move bring that to our lives?
It didn't feel as if it would, so we didn't.

It's all coming back, a revisit to retrogrades gone by---and the lessons.
I learned lessons, during that particular period, related to truth and trust---
Trusting that I could give Voice to my own truth---
Trusting my inner voice, allowing my inner guidance to lead the way---
With Saturn in Libra looming, just a few weeks away, back then---
Surely setting up valuable lessons, for the Libra cycle heading my way.

I wondered if I was on the path to my own truth, realizing how often I'd been distracted---
Even seeking out the distraction, to take me from speaking and writing---my own truth.

So, what am I supposed to do?
Conflictingly intuitive, backwards reviewing---
Searching up and down and back and forth---
For the switch---
Where is the switch to shut this idiocy off?

And then a big "Huh," comes out of both my mouth and my heart, almost at the same time!
I think---oh my word---
I am beginning to see---
That----I secretly like Mercury Retrogrades!

Oh shit!
I've just admitted that to myself, and now to the world!
Yes, it's painful when things go awry---during this period.
Yes, things can break down---communications disrupted.
Objects we count on to get us through each day---
Become unreliable---
How could I, a Libra, actually LIKE this time period?

I think I have to get a glass of wine and ponder this whole thing, again.

Well, till the next time, fellow Earth Students---

Let's all be careful out there---
Mercury Retrograde is sure to Re-Shi(f)t our reality!