'Welcome to my 'first' discussion,...i feel kinda responsible ! ha, ha .
I hope to 'touch' , & 'evoke' on the moment of 'transeference',...' passing through ' / on ,...
....' the release ' !
My own feelings toward these moments are highlighted by my Dad , & i ,...& the 'untimely'? passing
as i held him in my arms,....& a complete feeling of " 'It's ok,....all is taken care of,....the suffering has ended,...he is safe , & well "
I have used ' speech ' italics because within the room at the time,..' the voice ' of both my dad, & an ' outside force ' were present,....yet.... ' physically inaudible ' .
It felt the most natural thing to hear this,..even though the shock of it all was overwhelming beyond my belief,...,..one could assume ' that ' would be the ' main impression ' to land on me, but ' no '
it was the voices, & guidance !
My life has not been peppered ' too much 'by religion,...but i have always been 'open' to higher energies,..& am aware of how spirit plays a huge part in ' who we are '.
I distinctly remember ' the force' in the room at the time,..& and find it 'incredible' ...that the same force made it's presence 'totally clear ' at the birth of my four children,.....even in " the aura of a scent "
NOW,...to the song ! .....
This is a 'first draught',....but it was important to 'trap' the emotion',....i had not long returned from the place of its birth,....an amazingly hot island,..full of parotts in the trees, volcanic rocks,..& latin music playing all day,..'lovely'.
Why oh why did a song of 'that force', & 'atmosphere' persist in being written ?
It seemed,..& seems totally 'unconnected' from this 'location'
I had no means of recording it temporarily, so had to keep it in my mind for a week or so .
The song bore no attatchment to it's suroundings,...but was so strong 'coming through',....
..it would have made more 'sense' to have written & song more in the Santana ,..or Jobim mould,..
but 'no' that song was arriving,..& i was it's channel !
What made things 'even more' astounding was the fact that the girl i was with, had been 'placed' in front of me at a Santana gig in London after the most complicated series of conotations, & changes--
( seats ,times etc) = we seen each other the following day,.& the holiday was arranged soon after..
... 'in a hurry'
...I felt uneasy' about the speed of it all,..but also 'urged ' to go ahead,..& 'trust'.
We parted a little while after returning home,.' the legistics of 'distance ' perhaps the referee,.
..but i ' know' ,..i 'know',..... this was meant to be,...
I'll never forget her reaction,..her face,..body language ,..when i came running up from the open air pool, & said,.." can you give me a piece of paper, & a pencil please,? ,.." do you want to write something for reception ? " she replied ,.....no,..i've got a song coming in !
I then scribbled down the first words, & established the melody,..editing as i wrote, & trying to put new parts 'on hold' ,..while i trapped the first ones,..while all the time 'humming quietly' to help the flow.
I'd 'just' got the main song written,& the title placed at the top of the page,..( she deserves credit for urging me to stick with the word 'simply' )..."can you sing it for me,..sing it please,"..
...i explained that it was far from being finished, but her insistance, & the glow in her eyes made me surrender .
I went to out to 'our' balcony, & sang a nervous first take ,....
"That's incredible,..that's amazing,...how do you do that ?,...how can you just create such beauty from nowhere ?" ,... " it's from 'somewhere " i replied,.. "i don't question it,...i accept it ! "
"i think that's one of your best songs already, I've never known anyone who can do that,..it's magical " ,...." thanks,..it feels very powerful ".
To feel, & see the the effect on a comparitive stranger 'was' ,& 'is' a life changing moment,..& my value of what comes to me through songwriting,...though serious,... is a joy beyond words !
Regardles of the preceeding circumstances of someone 'passing on',..i believe the 'actual moment' of transition is of the 'highest pleasure' , & ' enlightment' .
In this song i draw parallells with the beautiful rhythm of nature, & humanity,.....
& how even the most exagerated weather still looks perfectly 'natural '.
I also emphasise that a torch waits for us all !
" Let's play song intros Dad,.." said Eve,..we were walking down to her mums house past the cemetery,...my car was off the road at the time,.after a few intros,..i said " let's make this the last one 'spesh,..so we can have a wee blether before we get there "
Eve started with a percussion intro, then stopped,.." i can't get it ' i said,.." you know it Dad ! ",...
i asked Eve to sing it again,...& i still couldn't quite get it,.then Eve said " it's 'yours Dad,.
...'Simply moving on ,......." aahh, of course,..well done " .
' EVE ' passed on (14) last year,..i cry so much as i write this 'now', it feels my heart will stop ,....
Why ?.... why was ' that song ' the last one she sang & that we shared ?,...
..of all the songs,..& subject matter Eve could have chosen ,..........
' I feel 'increasingly' that sometimes ' we ' are the ones being ' written ' ?
Enjoy the song,...& please let me know your feelings .