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Joyce Shafer's Blog (71)

Have You Thanked Your Money Today?

“It’s better to light a candle than curse the darkness.” Great quote, but what does it have to do with thanking your money?

A while back I published an article titled “Set Them Free.” In it I wrote, “How can you expect your relationship with her to be anything other than what it’s been as long as you have her fixed in your mind as capable of only certain behaviors?”

I didn’t then envision the person the way I’d like her to be, I chose to just let her be…that is, be who she… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on October 1, 2010 at 10:06am — No Comments

Why and How Focus on Attracting Is Misplaced

“Attract” is one of the primary buzz-words used to explain how manifestation works. Whichever word you use, you may be putting the “cart before the horse.”

I’ve seen and used the words attract, magnetize, match vibrations, alignment—and others. They’re all good words that represent a specific action or dynamic; and it really is only one action being represented, no matter which label you use.

But, this action (and therefore the words used to describe it—attract, etc.) is… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on September 24, 2010 at 3:07pm — 1 Comment

Need to Amp Up Your Motivation and Commitment?

Can a simple statement really get you motivated to start, do, or improve something you’re putting off? Let’s find out.

Think of something you desire to be different, or feel challenged about following through on. See or feel it in your mind’s eye. Really connect with it. Now, say to yourself, gently and truthfully: “I can do better than this.”

First things first—remove any critical self-judgment from the picture right now. It isn’t useful.

Second, do you believe… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on September 17, 2010 at 11:46am — No Comments

Is Your Thinking Higher or Lower?

You either think from your situations or think from your possibilities. You can tell which you’re choosing by looking at what’s happening and how you feel.

Beliefs about life challenges can lead you to forget how and why thinking from possibilities (higher) works better than thinking from situations (lower). An example is, “How am I going to pay my bills?” (situation) vs. “How might I manifest an extra $X this month?” (possibilities). The first one leads you to stay in bad feelings:… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on September 10, 2010 at 9:13am — No Comments

Is It Time to Clean Your Mental Filters?

Next time you feel stressed ask yourself if it’s actually an event or situation, or your thoughts about it causing your stress. More often than not, it’s time to check your mental filters.

Every thought you have about everything that happens in your life is processed through your filters: your learned beliefs, assumptions, presumptions, and past experiences. Unless you’ve shifted this—cleaned or regularly clean your “filters,” you likely experience every moment through a slightly—or… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on September 3, 2010 at 10:20am — No Comments

Is It Your Strategy or Your Thinking That Is the Issue?

Maybe you’re looking for T.H.E. strategy that will create the shift you desire in your life. But if you’re using Stinkin’ Thinkin’, you’ll stay frustrated.

“Just show me the strategy that will create my desired outcome!” you say.

Here’s a question: Have you fully decided to succeed, win, shift, be happy—whatever your wording is here—or have you decided to embrace struggle?

If that question sounds counterintuitive, I ask you, what are you feeling and experiencing… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on August 27, 2010 at 8:15am — No Comments

Do You Push When You Could Ride?

It happens to all of us when we desire to fix, change, or shift something: we push when we could ride. What’s that really about?

Years back, the guy cutting my hair told me about a conversation he’d had with a co-worker. She had complained that her father had used the push lawnmower on their acreage when he could have used the riding mower. He told her, “That’s how you live your life.”

I had a couple of days when I was trying to figure something out—something I wanted to… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on August 20, 2010 at 8:40am — No Comments

Two Ways Solutions Are Not Always Obvious

There are two ways (or maybe “times” is a better word) a best solution might not be obvious: Before—when we need one and After—once one is in effect.

Way 1—Before

(This is taken from “The Prisoner in the Dark Cave.”)

A man sentenced to death is placed in a dark cave. He’s told there is a way out and if he finds it, he’s free. The only light source is a hole above him where food and water are to be lowered to him for thirty days; but after thirty days, this will… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on August 6, 2010 at 12:17pm — 2 Comments

How to Identify Your True Calling

Read this question and note how it makes you feel: If you had to do (HAD to do) one thing for the rest of your life—for no pay—what would it be? What you FEEL is a key to learning something about yourself.

Some of you had no problem answering this question. You’ve always known what you wanted to do and are either doing it or working your way towards it.

Some of you have never had a good enough question (like this one) to assist you to tune into what you really want to do,… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on July 23, 2010 at 10:34am — 2 Comments

How Well Do You Cope with Change?

There are two types of change to be aware of—the type you desire and the type you don’t. Do you feel you manage yourself well enough through these?

Do You Want Your Life to Be Different?

If you desire change in some area of your life, the first thing that must change is whatever in you prevents or delays your desired outcome. Inevitably, your desired outcome is to feel the way you wish to feel about whatever it is that has your attention.

What are some ways you… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on July 16, 2010 at 6:20am — No Comments

Does a Road Trip Parallel a Life Journey?

Do you ever wonder if you’re on the right road of your life? If this is or has been your experience, how did you manage yourself?

A friend and I took a road trip using her GPS to get us from New York City to Louisiana. We wanted to beat the anticipated July Fourth traffic, so left Thursday evening and drove until we stopped for the night.

The next morning we continued on the interstate highway marked as West. At 1:30 we’d been driving in the beautiful state of Virginia for… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on July 9, 2010 at 5:12am — No Comments

Do Your Emotions Ever Get Stuck About A Sticky Situation?

You're going along in your day-to-day, applying your self-empowerment tools and knowledge—then WHAM! You find yourself in the thick of a situation and it's as though part of you says, "What tools?"

If you've ever experienced what's described in the opening paragraph, you're likely familiar with the snowball effect it can have . . .

Something happens, and you feel pulled off course.

That full range of emotions you have, and feel pretty satisfied about how you… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on June 25, 2010 at 4:36am — No Comments

Do You Explain What Is Appropriate for You?

Dr. Judith Orloff said the word No is a complete sentence. Do you feel you have to explain or justify a No response? If you do this, it's a habit you can shift, even if it takes time to get comfortable doing it naturally.

A description from the "Medicine Cards" book and card set by Sams and Carson states you have the right to say, "That's not appropriate for me at this time." It also states there is no obligation to say more than that. If your tendency is to explain your… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on June 18, 2010 at 6:48am — No Comments

Does Self Appreciation Affect Your Experiences and Results?

Whatever you believe about how to achieve desired results, your outcomes ARE affected by how much self-appreciation you feel. It's the same for how you engage your experiences.

Let's imagine you agree that . . .

How your attention (emotionally-charged thoughts) is focused (exercised or applied) directly relates to what you give, receive, and experience more of; and that

How you experience others and events in your life, at the inner level, is a direct result of—how your… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on June 11, 2010 at 5:43am — No Comments

You Reached Your Goal So Why Do You Feel Less Than You Anticipated?

You pick a goal and hit it. You’re supposed to feel good or great, even amazing—but, you don’t. Hmm . . .

You followed the formula: picked a goal, made a plan, worked your plan. You succeeded, but you don’t feel the way you thought you would. What happened?

You aimed at the wrong target.

Here are three ways that can happen.

1. You set a goal based on a “should,” whether you “should” on yourself or someone else did. You did everything required, rang… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on May 28, 2010 at 5:05am — No Comments

Do You Rub Your Thoughts the Wrong Way?

There is a phrase, “That person rubs me the wrong way,” that basically means the person (though it also could be a situation) doesn’t make you feel good. You, at times, do this with your thoughts (most of us do); so what works to shift this?

Esther Hicks of Abraham fame has a video on YouTube, “Now Is Where All Your Power Is, Part 2,” where she likens feeding negative thoughts—any thoughts that take you out of feeling good—with rubbing your hand on sandpaper. You wouldn’t rub your… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on May 21, 2010 at 6:24am — No Comments

What Is the Main Thing You Focus On?

Bob Proctor said, “The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.” We are best served if it’s what we focus on. So, what’s the “main thing?”

Actions? Beliefs? Results? Desires? Goals? Nope.

The Main Thing is stated in this other wise statement by Bob: “Your results are an expression of your own level of awareness.” Your focus is better placed on expanding your awareness. Everything else is built upon this. How often this fact gets lost in the… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on May 14, 2010 at 9:32am — No Comments

Do You Ever Do This Immediate Stress Buster?

This one action shifts stress, energy, and yes, often even outcomes, in an instant. And, when you feel life is heaping one frustration on you after another, it seems the last thing you’d ever do.

This particular action happened the first time for me decades back, without having read or heard anyone say it was a “technique” to use. Now, it’s recognized as such; but it’s also an easy one to forget or dismiss. The first time I did it, it simply FELT like the only thing to do at that… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on May 7, 2010 at 11:39am — 1 Comment

Do You Feel Authentic?

Do you ever feel afraid to be as you are? See if actor Patrick Stewart’s story and these comments help you think or feel differently about this.

Tavis Smiley interviewed Patrick Stewart (Captain Picard in Star Trek: The Next Generation). The topic of Stewart’s famed hairless dome came up, and Stewart revealed he was as bald by age nineteen as he is today; and that for years, he wore a comb-over. His defining moment came after lunch at the home of a Hungarian black belt Judo player,… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on April 30, 2010 at 10:03am — No Comments

Do You Attach Untrue Stories to Experiences?

A simple action sent me back, in memory, to the first time I became aware of attaching an untrue story to an experience. See if you recognize your own predilection or habit of doing this.

I needed to open a new pint of Half & Half. The container had that opening that requires you pull the flaps just right to create the V-shaped spout. I started the pull and had a flashback.

I don’t recall my age, but I was old enough to get myself ready for school without adult… Continue

Added by Joyce Shafer on April 25, 2010 at 8:30am — 2 Comments