Architects of a New Dawn

We’d like to show the side of the world you don’t normally see on television.

Ilona pointed out that English is "sometimes difficult". This is a very restrained assessment of what may be the most illogical language (I'm making an assumption here as I speak no other language to make a comparison).

Someone at some time must have made the decision that what our language really needs is "silent" letters; letters that are not enunciated in speech. This makes about as much sense as putting plastic cherries in a fruit cake.

As much as the English like to huff and puff about American-English spelling, it makes considerably more sense to write "Dialog" as opposed to "Dialogue". Why we needed the additional "ue" is beyond me. Also, "Thru" makes more sense than "Through".

It wouldn't be so bad if ough indicated a consistent sound but it could indicate an oo sound or off or uff or ow or, in the case of borough and thorough, an uh sound. In English, spelling cannot be relied on as an indication of how the word should sound... even that "should" doesn't make sense. Why the silent "L"?

Would, could and should at least have a consistent sound. So, logically, The Boy Stould On The Burning Deck.....? Er, no. That's stood. So Would, Should, Could and Stood all sound the same. So, at Christmas, do we have Christmas Poulding or Christmas Pooding? No. We have Christmas Pudding, which does not rhyme with budding although it shood... sorry. I mean shud... no, sorry should.

How we ever got ourselves into this mess, I can only speculate. I imagine some scribes locked away in a study, putting the alphabet to good use committing our spoken language to written from (where did that "W" come from?)

Roderick the Elder (names have been changed to protect the guilty), scribe to Ethelred the Unready (son of Thladwick the Undecided) glances across to his assistant Llewellyn the Illogical.
"What the devil are you writing there, boy?"
"Dialogue" Llewellyn replies
"That says Dialogooee!" Roderick cries
"No. It doesn't" Llewellyn insists
"Yes. It does! Look. You've put a U and an E on the end!"
"They're silent" Llewellyn explains.
"SILENT!!!??? Are you mad, boy!!!??? Why the devil do we need silent letters??" Roderick explodes
"Er... just in case" says Llewellyn
"In case?? In case of what??"
Llewellyn looks up wearily: "Look. Are we going to argue about this all day? Only we've got Through, Thorough, Trough, Cough, Tough and Rough to get through before five!"

Roderick the Elder lets it go for the moment but he resolves to take the matter up with the Lord High Chancellor, Sir Thomas Featherstonehaugh (pronounced Fanshaw).

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