?????

[AkashicWreckage]

I'm not sure why I'm typing this.
Especially since I'm almost all type out.
(Yes I see the typo there, I'm too lazy to go back and correct it.)
That's all.

I was trying to settle down the other morning---
Actually, it wasn't the other morning, it was yesterday morning.
Time is behaving weirdly, as I've mentioned before.
But anyway, I couldn't focus on finishing up some of my stories.
I figured I'd pop into Crone to the Bone and read, maybe limit myself to a comment or two---
I only comment there infrequently, as I'm not one to disrupt groups or anything like that with my foolish nonsense...

As I was attempting to make my way through the posts, I stumbled across Violette, selfishly---
Yes, I know that's judgment, and of the ego mind.
I'm okay with that, for now.
So, I couldn't help but notice all the exclamation points and question marks she was frittering away.
When I tried to delete the excess, when responding to her posts, she would come back at me hard!
Bold and abundant exclamation points---like bullets at me, she hurled.
And just when I was nearly victorious and thought I had her on a limited budget of !!!---

She slammed me with question marks!
It was like fighting a battle on two fronts---
Starring down the rear at a tramp stamp across her lower back---
Violette tossed her saucy curls and kept pummeling me with punctuation!

I had to pull out the big guns, I just had to.
Basically, I'm a non-violent person, especially after I got through meanopause---
But that's another story---

So, as I sat watching my lap top screen---
Waiting anxiously to see what other forms of punctuation she might think about throwing directly at me---
I asked for assistance.
Look, I knew I couldn't handle her all by myself.
None of the other Crones seemed to be about---
Gardens, caves, nunneries, meadows, they fled to, and Jeanne was sleeping in bed (or so we heard)---
Something about Pacific time, I'm not sure...

So, in between tweezing my eyebrows, and searching in a 9X magnifying mirror for a stray chin hair---
And having to watch Violette's every move---

I asked for Someone---
Anyone---
An Angel----
A Guide---

And after last week's near fiasco with the Ascended Masters, I knew I dare not go there and even think about asking for their help.

~~~A Grammatarian Guide~~~
With perhaps a copy of the Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation (10th Edition) hanging around on its person!
Yes, that was it!

Okay, so I moved the laptop off my lap, and over to the side.
I thought about lighting some nice Spirit Guide Incense (love that stuff)---
But decided to skip that, the fan was going and I was just too lazy to get up---

I closed my eyes.
And decided that I hadn't counted my breaths in a while.
As I began to count my breaths---

Wouldn't you know it?

I lost count because my mind began to wander.
Rules are rules, so I went back to one.
And, I tried to rein in my thoughts, and just focus on watching my breath---
And counting it---
And then I was thinking, in my head, "Are we supposed to count on the in breath, or the out breath?"

Damn.
I knew I had to go back to one, which was fine because I forgot what number I was on anyway.
So, I start all over again, thinking to myself, "I'll try counting on the in breath and see how that goes."

Then I began to cheat and go to two on the out breath.
Crap!
It wasn't working and I was starting to get agitated.

So, I just closed my eyes and listened to the music in my head.
Deliciously sweet, such long sweeping notes, pulsing around me.

I began to feel something---
A presence in the room with me---
I wasn't sure what to do---
I continued to sit and wait, feeling an energy expand towards me.

At this point, I put up some protection around me, juuuusssst in case.
One never knows.
Crazy neighborhood and all---

After invoking Arch-Angel Michael, Arch-Angel Uriel, Arch-Angel Gabriel and Arch-Angel Raphael---
The 4 Pillars of Protection----

I figured I should also invoke Arch Angel Metatron too---
Just for good measure---

Plus I know that Carlos Santana has a special relationship with Metatron and Sandalphon---
Arch Angel Sandalphon is the Master of Music---
And---
:::::smacking myself upside the head:::::
Hunh!
Maybe it's Sandalphon who is responsible for the music in my head?!
I'll have to dispatch my Divine Detective archetype to investigate this possibility!

Meanwhile, back to business---
I allowed a part of my own energy to expand towards the presence.
On the outer edges of my expanded energy field----
I began to allow our energies to mix---

I began to feel that there might be more than one energy with me.
I asked---
"Who all is with me????????????"

I sat quietly and waited for the answer.
I could feel several energies coalesce along the borders of my heightened auric field----
I figured I'd wait for them all to settle down before pressing on with my questions.

I didn't have long to wait.
I could feel my bed fill up with the presences of whomever was with me.
The bed was moving a bit, and I grabbed onto the night table for support.
Things began to quiet down---so I repeated my question---
"Role Call! Who's with me?"

Again, no answer---
So, I sat there and waited, clearing my mind and my chakras---

And then---
The music began building, sweeping and swirling around me, and then it retreated---
Into the background...

And I heard---

"AW, please go grab a notebook and a pen. You will be our channel to bring the Messages to the Mavens."

I reached over and grabbed my laptop, I wasn't about to go foraging around for a notebook, and besides, I can type faster than I can write.
I sat waiting, and suddenly a question popped into my head.

I asked, "Oh, you want me to channel a message for the Crones? Are they the Mavens that you refer to?"

Several presences began to speak at the same time, and Metatron silenced them with a look---
"Mavens, in Hebrew and maybe even Yiddish, can have both a male and female connotation, AW, " he said.

"No way, Metatron, how do you know this to be true?" I questioned.

"I am the Celestial Chronicler, I take notes on everything. I have scribed for thousands of years, I ought to know." He responded.

"Okay fine. I stand corrected." I backed down from this, for the time being.

Silence again and I waited.

It began.
"We bring a matter of great importance to humanity.
Beloved Dear Ones---
It has come to the attention of many beings throughout your Star System---
That many humans tend to use way too much punctuation----
Or not enough punctuation.
This is a fine line that you Earth Students must walk, at this juncture in your evolutions.
Many of you are coming together---building communities and forging friendships across time and space.
Some of you are supposedly channeling messages from the Masters too---"

Another incredible energy stepped in and continued---
"Due to the Stargate Portal Entranceway---
You know---The Archway of 8/8---
And the looming 9/9 Junction---
Followed by the 10/10 turnoff right around the corner in your timed existences---
Several millions of you have lost your grips on grammar and have exceeded the allotment of exclamation points, question marks and---
Especially YOU, AkashicWreckage, or whatever you're calling yourself today---
Your dashes and dots are very irritating."

Dead silence and I was holding my breath as I was typing all this.
These creeps had some friggin' nerve---
Complaining about my dashes, or hyphens, as I like to call them---

A shadowy presence began to speak.
"What's with all this over usage of these highly energetic symbols?
We've given these tools to humanity to help them with their shifting communication ascensions and whatnot---
These symbols have been especially charged with energy, Reiki, and they are supposed to be used as an aide---
As a way to express...
One's thoughts with more clarity---
Communication in The written language.
Some common punctuation marks..."

Metratron moved in and interrupted---
"While the rules of punctuation are constantly evolving, as they resolve their own past life issues---when maybe they were commas---
Or maybe even single apostrophes---
Some apostrophes have even found their twin flames and have become quotation marks---
Symbolizing the rise in the ascensionational vibratory rate---
But anyway, in the old days, there wasn't even capitalization!
Very few spaces between words, if any, and punctuation marks were virtually unheard of!"

A very soft spoken energy, nudged along the corners of my energy field---
There was a pause---marked by an invisible comma, followed by a series of dots---
I knew what that meant instantly!
This being was deliberately being quiet and leaving stuff out!
Almost communicating nothing, and yet at the same time---I was supposed to understand what it was trying to communicate!

"Much later with this crap. I've got stuff to do. Just get to the point!!!" I exclaimed!!!

A mysterious presence began to speak.
"While these are everyday symbols in life, you must communicate the urgency of the situation with impending extinction of exclamation points!
Violette, we're sorry to say, has far exceeded anything remotely reasonable when it comes to the everyday rationing of these energetic aids!
We've tried to stop her by booby trapping her keyboard, but she is far too clever for her own good.
She ordered another one so fast, we couldn't intervene.
Remember AW when we had to punish you for your far over the top usage of dashes and dots?"

"Great God Almighty!!! Was that you all, who freakin' made MY life miserable for 8 long hard months?" I was astounded by this revelation.

You see, it was a rainy day----
July 4, 2008--- 3:0 something pm.
I quite suddenly was finding myself thrown back in time!
On that grim day in July, when others were surely barbecuing...

Without warning---
Well, the tumultuous clouds in the sky might have been a portend of things to come---
And yes---okay---
There were the sounds of thunderous crashes of----well---thunder---
That probably should have been a dead giveaway---

But still---with almost no warning---
There was a bolt of light or lightning that felt as if it were right in the house, and it may have been.
I tossed my lap top off my lap.
The lights went off, and I heard the thing for the airconditioner---
What's it called---
It's on the wall out in the dining room---
The thermostat, that's it...
Well, I heard that make a noise.
I was instantly in the small hallway, trying to use that as shelter---because---
It really felt like the lightning was right here.
Beach Buddy had leaped off the couch as well and met me there.

Holy Shi(f)t!

After about 10 minutes or so, we heard the hum of the refrigerator and the lights went back on.
We each went our separate ways, back to our respective lap tops.
Mine wouldn't work, no connection.
His wouldn't work either.

We played with the modem.
We tried calling Comcast.
Unplugged and reset everything.
To no avail.
I was lost, and so was Beach Buddy.
It looked like we were going to have to make do with talking with each other on this dismal July 4th.

At about 9pm, I had had it, withdrawal was setting in.
I grabbed the keys and ordered Beach Buddy to get in the car with me.
We went to the Super Walmart to buy another cable modem.
Got it home, plugged it all in and called Comcast.

Crap---they couldn't do their reset thing until the next day!
I was near tears and so was Beach Buddy---
I think he was near tears because he was frustrated having to deal with me.

We tried tapping into someone else's wireless, but it would last for about 5 minutes and then cut out.

Finally, after a long, hard, miserable night, the following afternoon, we were good to go.
Or so we thought.
We had service for just a few short hours when it went out again.
Called Comcast and they said maybe the following Tuesday, they would send someone out.
I begged and pleaded.
Nope.

Tuesday rolls around and we find out that the original modem was fried---
So was the router---
And the Vonage---
The plug in the bathroom where I would plug in my dryer---
Beach Buddy went to get a new wireless card for his lap top---
Only to find out that he still couldn't get online.

The slot thing for the wireless card had been blown out as well by that bolt of lightning.
Shortly after that, the keyboard on my lap top started to have a mind of its own.
I lost the ability to type J's, A's, L's etc various punctuation, including exclamation points and question marks.
Hyphens were okay, but only for a short time.
But half the keyboard didn't function.

So, by this point in time, almost a week after the strike---I asked Beach Buddy if I could use his lap top.
I opened up a Word doc and typed up all of the letters of the alphabet, upper and lower case---numerous times.
Then I did the same with all the punctuation, numbers etc.
After that, I had to type up my passwords and various email addresses and asked him to send it to me, so I could download it and use it to communicate with civilization.
He did.
And I waited, and waited for it to arrive.
He must have sent it to the wrong email, probably making a mistake with the typing of my email address.

He said, "Which of the 800 effing email addresses was I supposed to use?"

So, not only didn't I have the word doc with the letter linkage to the rest of the known world and the unknown world as well---
He'd sent all my email addresses and passwords to some stranger.
Or, it could have been one of my email addresses that I'd forgotten I had.
But still---how could he?

He resent it to me and I had to go and change all my passwords.
And wouldn't you know, I typed in a new password and promptly forgot it.
Shi(f)t and a half!
Luckily I had downloaded the document before changing my passwords.
I got locked out of my email addresses and had to wait a day---
To change them all to something I might have half a chance at remembering.

For about a day or so, I was about as frustrated as could be.
Copying and pasting letters and hypens to try to continue writing my stuff.
Beach Buddy then had a brilliant idea---
Buy a keyboard to plug into the thing on the side of the laptop!

I was back in business, or was I?
What a pain in the neck and back and side.
I had to position the keyboard to the side of me and the lap top on my lap.
I had to get myself into a impossible contorted position, and for what?
Just to communicate.

I finally adjusted and about 3 weeks later, the keyboard stopped functioning.
Beach Buddy bought me another one.
That lasted for about a month.
Then he had to buy me another one and another 3 weeks after that!

This went on and on---having to replace the plug in keyboard, until February, when Beach Buddy bought me a new lap top!

Okay----what was this little trip down Memory Lane about?????

Oh, right.

And, I have to hurry up now and get this finished.

Arch Angel Gabriel pushed his way into my energy field and began to point his pointer finger at me.
"Wreckage," he began, "You are the Chosen Channel for Communicating the importance of this issue!
Spare no words---go easy on the hypens---use periods...we have a surplus of those...
Use questions marks with caution and you can just forget about exclamation points.
Somehow---it IS up to YOU, to save the Earth Students---
Beloveds---
Wondrous Ones---
Blessed Be People---
And all the rest of the folks, from the destruction that is at the brink of your collective doorsteps."

Arch Angel Gabe (or Gabby for the feminine aspect) continued, "Don't waste your time trying to save people who do not Capitalize their words---
They have special dispensations and will assist you by sending you energy and good vibrations for your task."

"I really don't have time to be the Punctuation Prophetess for the Free World." I thought to myself, wanting to use an exclamation or two there, but knew I couldn't.

As if reading my thoughts, which he probably was, Gabe said---
And I quote---
"Semicolons, Colons, Parenthesis, Periods, Asterisks, Dashes, Quotation Marks, and Italics ...
Punctuation marks are The Signs You've Been Looking For."

I held my breath, in anticipation...
Waiting for this entire essay to come to an end, as I was getting tired of all this typing.

Beach Buddy just so happened to pass by me at this point---
He looked at me, and I realized that I was seeing a new reality that I hadn't ever seen before!

I looked at him quizzically and asked, "Do you have any idea how I can end this thing?"

Emerging in his aura, I began to see first one, and then another---
One more, and then 3 of them----
Several more began to float right above his crown chakra----

He answered, quite bluntly, "That's what I've been asking."

Which explained the gift that was being bestowed upon me---
In his usually muddled aura, about 2 feet surrounding his body---
I saw the symbols, new signs of a new reality dawning---

Question Marks floating within and around his field!

Amazingly beautiful, floating to the music building and building----

As with any ending, it can only mean one thing---

What's next???????

[Imelda Maguire]

You are a very entertaining spirit indeed. Fabulous writing.

~*LOVE ALWAYS*~

[AkashicWreckage]

Jeanne,
Thank you so much Jeanne! And thanks for tolerating my Crone "Madness"!
AW

[AkashicWreckage]

I don't know, Violette, when I will publish. I like not having pressure and if I start to even remotely allow my mind to go there---I'm afraid it will take all the fun from this, and the release of the madness that is in my mind---will be corralled
All in good time, sweet Violette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AW.

[Jeanne]

OK... so I read it... and its an amazing, imaginative - over the top imaginative piece of prose. You rawk and roel!

[AkashicWreckage]

Sorry----------------------------------------
I got carried away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sheesh, cut me some slack, would ya?

@
AW

[Jeanne]

OMG... do you have this in the audio version?