Is the Road of Destiny Paved with The Power of Positive Intentions?
Or, is it a twisting hair-pin turns, hidden pot hole kind of Divine Paradise?
Or, a Remote Road Less Traveled?
I'm not sure.
I've tried the whole manifesting thing--- focusing on what I want to bring into my life.
And sure, that feeling---coupled with the wonderful visualizations that I have no problem conjuring up---is wonderful.
I've even had it work a few times---
One time, as I was beginning to drive back home from a visit with a friend about 35 miles from where I lived...
I said to myself, without being notified that I was about to say this to myself--
"Wouldn't it be nice if there was a check for $1000 in the mail for me?"
My logical mind answered, "What are you freakin' crazy? You're not expecting any checks, get real!"
The next thing I knew, another part of my mind lashed back, "Leave her alone! She can think whatever she wants, why are you so negative?"
Logical Mind retorted, "I'm just keeping it real, someone needs to---we just can't let her think these crazy thoughts!"
"Hey, who died and left you in charge of what is real?" some character in my mind shouted.
So, there I was, trying to focus on driving, and I've got all this dialogue going on in my head.
I deliberately changed the subject and began to mentally make a list of the chores I needed to do when I got home.
When I arrived home, I began to clean, do laundry and then went to the mailbox.
I went back upstairs, put the mail on the table and continued with my chores.
Kids came home from school, and the usual late afternoon and evening activities began.
The next day, as I was finishing up my chores, I remembered the mail that I had forgotten to go through.
As, I was flipping through the advertisements and circulars, about to toss them in the recycling bin, an envelope slipped out.
I picked it up, looked at it and the return address was from the attorney I had used to file for the divorce.
I knew I didn't owe him anything, and the divorce had been final about a month or so before, so I wasn't in a hurry to open the letter.
I figured it was a standard, "Thank you for your business, and if you ever need us again, just call," type of form letter.
I took a shower, and decided to go to the pool for a couple of hours, and then I see the letter sitting there on the table.
I was about to throw it out, when in my head I hear, "Open it up!"
So I did.
Inside was a really nice personal letter from the attorney, with a check for $1141!!
I began to laugh, remembering the disagreement that took place in my head the day before.
Mostly, though, I was puzzled.
What had really taken place the day before?
Had I tapped into something unknowingly?
I certainly had no indication from my attorney previously that our contract was anything more than a flat fee.
I didn't really need the money, although I could use it, if you know what I mean.
Had I somehow manifested that?
I could go on and on about various things that I've thought, and then the Universe delivers something wild back to me.
But it's so random.
I've often wondered if there really is a Formula?
Think the thought.
Add a picture of it in your head.
If you can't get a picture of it in your head---
Draw a picture of it on nice construction paper---
If you can't draw to save your life---
Or don't have construction paper, go find some magazines and find pictures of it.
If you don't have magazines---
Get out a piece of loose-leaf paper and write the wish 14 times.
1 +4 =5, angels like the number 5---why, we don't know...
Mull it over 3 times.
Take a break.
Then re-mull it 2 times.
Blow nose 5 times (again, angels like the number 5)
Even if you're great at visualizing, and you didn't have to draw a picture, or cut out pictures from a magazine---
Go write down your wish or what you would like to manifest.
Hopefully, you've gotten this idea to manifest right around the time of a New Moon---
If not, you might be Shi(f)t out of luck for a while.
Take the piece of paper you've written this stuff on, rip it into 5 pieces.
Take out a dish, or a large shell---or quickly run to a New Age store and buy something appropriate.
Race home, smudge your space, light some nice incense---Nag Champa will do...
Take 5 deep breaths, do a few squats, center yourself.
Raise both arms to the Universe.
Take out a lighter---
Take out the 5 pieces you've ripped your wishes into---
Put it into a dish or that nice shell you just bought, light it on fire.
Watch it burn and as it does, imagine that your wish is wafting out into the ethers, grids, matrices, etc.
Feel free to blow it with a few deep breaths to hasten it out of your space and onto its journey.
Know, Dear Ones, in your heart and solar plexus chakras, that your wishes will be taken to the appropriate area of the Realms, for fulfillment.
Once this smoke makes its way into the Grids, special Manifestation Smoke Guides will blow it onto the next area of the Fulfillment Center.
By the way, once you've lit the pieces of paper, there are no cancellations or changes that can be made.
Rumor has it, that out there in the Ethers, crews begin to work on your order immediately.
There is a 5 Day Guarantee---your wish will be delivered to you within 5 Business Days.
97% of all properly executed wishes, are shipped out the next business day, which is why nothing can be changed.
If for any reason, once your wish is delivered, you are not happy with it, it can be returned or exchanged, no questions asked.
Once the smoke is blown into the Order Department, Matrix Managers take over.
They check inventory and the smoke of your desires makes its way down the corridor to a huge warehouse.
Once there, your wishes are picked from the bins which contain the inventory, and your order is filled.
Additionally, once this smoke leaves the special dish you are burning it in, you should not think about it again.
You must focus on releasing whatever it is that you want to bring into your life.
Somehow, at the Fulfillment Center, if you dare to think about your wish or dream, a notification buzzer goes off.
This alerts the Matrix Managers, Manifestation Smoke Guides and the Shipping Department, that the formula has been interrupted.
Your order will then be diverted to the Pending Folder.
At this point, if you have dared to think about your dreams, desires and wishes---you will be on hold.
Everything in your life will come to a dead halt.
Others in your life, who somehow are oh soooooooo perfect when it comes to manifesting, are alerted by the Shipping Department.
If they didn't get the email from the Shipping Department, they just somehow know that you've messed up.
Your phone will ring, or they will show up at your front door.
They will remind you that it is YOU who effed this thing up.
They will warn you to watch your thoughts, release, do a colon cleanse or meditate on how to release this stuff.
All of this will throw you into a state of confusion.
You will begin to see Dead End signs where ever you go.
Things will begin to go awry and you will be caught in the reverberating loop of your thoughts.
You will be convinced that you are to blame for all of this.
This could go on for days, even weeks and months.
The Others in Your Life, won't leave you alone, not for a second.
At this point, Beloved Earth Students, you are caught up in a spiral, and it ain't a sacred spiral, believe me.
Different parts of your mind will be at odds with each other---which for me---is a daily thing.
I've gotten used to it already.
And, I'm here to tell you that it's okay.
I've lived through this crap.
I've been through a ton of messy manifestations and I've lived to tell the tale.
I think it's because I'm supposed to be around to show other Earth Students, both those who are beloved and those not so beloved---
That there IS NO formula!
At least not a one size fits all formula.
There is NO magic bullet, no special incense that will take your mind off your wishes, dreams and desires.
They don't call us humans for nothing.
It's NOT your fault.
Not that I want you to continue with your victim mentality or anything---
But, here's the thing.
We all do get precisely what we need at the most amazing times.
All that we really need to do is simply believe.
And, to the idiots at the Fulfillment Center---
Who gives a Shi(f)t?
All that stuff that I burned and blew out into the ethers a few months ago?
Keep it in the Pending Folder!
I didn't really want it anyway---so there!
The Ascension Primer for Dummies---
What's in Your Ascension Survival Kit?
Simple Exercises, poems, short stores, tips and recipes to Guide you through the incoming energies that the Nosy Entities are throwing our way---
Till the next time Earth Students, let's be careful out there...