Where Was I?
Did I want to continue, was the question---
It hung there waiting to be answered---
Feeling the lounge chair beneath me, and still feeling the sun on my body--
In this reality---
And yet, something else happening---
In what could only be called---
I'm not exactly the adventurous type---
I said "Yes---yes, I wish to continue."
With that, immediately in front of me, appeared an expanse of sand and rock----framed by ocean.
The rocks that I had been standing on---continued out into the water.
My eyes and mind began to take in the surroundings---
As I was walking forward, very slowly, I could see the most brilliantly blue water that I'd ever seen in my life, calmly flowing and moving around the rocks---
There were no waves---
Just a mesmerizing, glistening, shimmering display~~~
Sparkles on the water that was gently lapping at the sides of the rocks.
And, about maybe 20 or 30 feet from the rocks---that apparently marked some kind of dividing line between one reality and another---
I see a rock formation out in the water---jutting straight up from the calm ocean----and rising about 20 feet into the air.
And about 50 feet down from there, a series of 3 very large, offshore rocks---flat slabs of striated rock---bathed in sunlight.
The shoreline formed a curved, crescent like shape and the sandy beach seemed to flow all around the water.
As I walked, every one of my senses seemed sharply alive, absorbing---
And--- I became aware of the silence.
It was as if I were in a bubble.
I continue to walk out along the beach, and, in the distance I could see something.
As I drew closer, I could distinguish a house, nestled in sand dunes, tucked in among a frame of natural landscape.
A short distance from the house, I see a beach chair.
As I continued my journey, and drawing closer to the chair, I see a woman reclining, and her eyes are closed.
The strange silence continued as I was being led to this woman.
Not wishing to disturb her, I began to move more towards the shoreline when I felt a pulling sensation.
And then I felt nothingness. Then a veil of darkness covered me.
I was aware of my consciousness within the murky swirls of being drawn to within something.
I waited for it to end.
Suddenly, I'm seeing the water and rocks, from inside of somewhere.
Almost a tunnel vision like perspective and I try to look down to make sure I'm still there.
And I see legs, and feet; and sand and toes.
I see an arm, and then the other arm--- and long, fine fingers---where were my long nails, I wondered.
My attention was then drawn towards the distance, to the left---coming from where I had just entered where ever this reality was---
I see a man and he's looking first out at the water, and then in another direction.
I see him looking in the direction of where I thought I was---
Sure that I knew him, I tried to call out to him---
And then he begins to walk in the general direction of the house, and disappears into the sand dunes.
Where was I?
I wasn't uncomfortable, and my physical body seemed to no longer be with "me."
It was as if I were in a different position of reference, to the world that was taking shape before me.
It was bewildering and comfortable, both at the same time.
Again, where am I?
Then, as if looking out through double peepholes, I see the water, the large rocks out in the distance...
A loss of equilibrium---
I feel my self spinning---
Seeing hills rising in the distance from behind the dunes---
I feel as if I am not myself---but I know that I am.
I feel an enormous tug, dragging me and I am spiraling in nothingness---
And I find myself, on the other side of the rocks.
On the other side of where I had crossed the large rocks---
I turn around to look at the rocks, where the door had been, and there was nothingness.
A rainbow springs up from the sand and begins to move me back in the direction I had first traveled from---
I am in familiar territory now---
And then I am back in my body---
On my lounge chair---
In the late afternoon November sun---
I open my eyes and then close them again.
What had just happened?
I had no answers.
A week or so went by, and I had been out on the porch, to lay in the sun numerous times---
Wondering if it would happen again---
I even attempted several normal shamanic journeys, to see if I could will myself back there, to explore some more---
Nothing deliberate seemed to work, and the experience was never far from my thoughts.
One day, I was laying in bed, listening to music on my iPod.
It was a different Anugama CD that I had loaded into my iTunes a few days earlier.
Shamanic Dream II.
I had the 2nd track on "Sweetness of Earth."
My plan had been to take the 28 minutes or so, to simply relax---it was mid day, and I had about 2 or 3 hours before my sons would be home from school.
There was a beautiful, crisp cool breeze running through the room from the windows across from me.
I could see the queen palm outside the window, fronds moving in the wind, the blue sky framed in the background.
As I was laying there, the pillows propped up behind me---feeling the relaxation overtaking me----
I closed my eyes---
I feel a sensation of being pulled, yanked swiftly---
And I was back on the beach, the rainbow magic carpet under my feet---
The rocks approaching from the distance---ahead of me---
I jumped off---
Scrambled up the rocks to find the Door---
I couldn't find it, at first---
And then it was there in front of me---slightly ajar.
I slowly pushed it open and as I began to step through, I hear the question again---
"Do you want to continue?"
And then I hear~~~
"Do you want to move ahead?"